Noisy as two skeletons dancing on a tin roof. And funny birthday saying about age that shed a positive light on getting older. You dont just move into Texas. The 105 Funny get well wishes for friends, mother, father, son and daughter; 35+ Feel Better Soon Quotes; 65+ Get . 21 Texas birthday greetings ideas | birthday greetings, birthday, greetings I can't believe it's already been a year since the last time I didn't buy you anything for your birthday. There is no one alive who is 'you-er' than you! 5. From the deserts of West Texas to the beautiful Gulf Coast beaches, there is immense beauty in Texas that continues to provide inspiration to visitors and tourists. "Her favorite dress is her favorite blue jeans.". 60 Funny Birthday Quotes Perfect for Cards - Reader's Digest -John Gunther, Im so shook. Hey, we're thrilled that you're here! Above all, Texas is a nation in every sense of the word. John Steinbeck, If a mans from Texas, hell tell you. Discover and share Texas Birthday Quotes. Birthday Wishes quotes I'm taking your birthday as an opportunity to thank you for all that you are to me. this is one of the funniest Texas expressions! In three days no one could stand him. Joseph Heller, If I owned Texas and Hell, I would rent out Texas and live in Hell General Philip Henry Sheridan, The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that its impossible to be insane in Texas. Malcolm McDowell. There's more to come, be prepared and keep thinking big even as you grow older. He could draw a pat hand from a stacked deck.He always draws the best bull.Hes riding a gravy train with biscuit wheels.He could sit on the fence and the birds would feed him. Let us know below. Yippee your birthday is finally here. hapy birthday greetings typography with ornament iilustration. 130 Birthday Quotes To Make Someones Special Day - wow4u The festival includes live performances from Texas artists like Aaron Watson, the Josh Abbott Band, Kyle Park and more. Wishing you a birthday as wonderful as you are. Jennifer Yane. I look 40 and act 20; that made me 60. Create Account; View Cart; Help Plans and Pricing. -Texas Department of Transportation, If you grab enough Texas land, somethin good is bound to happen. Get ready for your Birthday prank today as well. The How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days star, 53, and . happy birthday png and psd. I got treated very badly in Texas. He shoots off his mouth so much he must eat bullets for breakfast. "Moscow mules and sweet tea.". -Stephen F. Austin, I must say as to what I have seen of Texas, it is the garden spot of the world. -Carl Sandburg, Texas is like a beckoning star to American settlers. So I got a cake." - Mitch Hedberg, comedian George Meredith on counting your years. Famous Birthday Quote William Butler Yeats: "From our birthday, until we die, / Is but the winking of an eye." Plato: "Old age: A great sense of calm and freedom. She could start a fight in an empty house.Hed argue with a wooden Indian.She raised hell and stuck a chunk under it.Hes the only hell his mama ever raised.Hes got his tail up.Shes in a horn-tossing mood.Shes so contrary she floats up-stream.Shes dancing in the hog trough.Hell tell you how the cow ate the cabbage. Alexander McCall Smith, Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. I'd be part of Texas folklore. We share comprehensive travel guides and tips for anyone traveling around America. A toast to you, birthday girl! -Jensen Ackles, Texas is like Australia with the handbrake off. Happy Birthday, Texas: How well do you know the state? Dan Solomon writes about politics, music, food, sports, criminal justice, health care, film, and business. Famous People From Texas & Celebs Born In Texas. Best Funny & Humorous Happy Birthday Wishes And we Texans know how to take it all in stride! May God smile on you and be gracious to you. -Unknown, Years ago someone pointed out that Texas is hell on women and horses. 50 Fabulous Things to Do in Washington State: Bucket List & Beyond! It means you're no fool. 2. Hes so country he thinks a seven-course meal is a possum and a six-pack. He gave me the wire-brush treatment.I got sandpapered.Ill snatch you bald-headed.Ill whip you like a redheaded stepchild.Ill knock you plumb into next week.He got his tail feathers trimmed. That Texas pride really shines through in these quotes. This aint my first rodeo. when youre really experienced at something! I wouldnt trust him. I have been a paying customer ofWorld Nomadsfor travel insurance for three years, and I happily recommend them. Rich, poor, Panhandle, Gulf, city, country, Texas is the obsession, the proper study, and the passionate possession of all Texans. John Steinbeck, Half of San Antonios population is of Mexican descent; the other half just eats that way. Mike Greenberg, If you really want to learn the attitude of how to handle risk, losing, and failure, go to San Antonio and visit the Alamo. They work to live there. Robert Rodriguez (this is one of our favorite Austin quotes! These are among the most empowering quotes for turning 25. A myriad of only the sweetest birthday quotes that we could find! Ron Brackin, I didnt drive eleven hours across the state of Texas to watch my cholesterol. : Janine Turner, There is a special mystique to Texas. A Texan outside of Texas is a foreigner.". Big Tex welcomed 3,959,058 visitors to Fair Park during the exposition, the largest attendance ever for an American state fair and the longest fair in American history. They hung the wrong horse thief. 118 Famous Texas Sayings and Phrases Along With Their Meanings I will pray that you receive more than you have hoped for this birthday. Put candles in a pie, and somebody's drunk in the kitchen." - Jim Gaffigan, comedian "I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. Happy 28th Birthday Quotes & Funny Captions - Darling Quote Here are my favorite quotes about Texas, including inspiration from poems, literature, pop culture, and quotes by famous Texas authors! All over the world, traveling Texans tend to identify as Texan rather than American, because, well, we get treated like celebrities when we do. Elizabeth Abrahamsen. J Jamie Oakes-Mitchell 33 followers More information Wishing you a Texas sized birthday! Its our favorite Texas saying, yall. I love you so much, honey. Texas is a cult. Lindsay Mcelwee, I Like The Image Texas Brings To Mindthat Of Bigness, Of Strength, Of Goodness. Ninfa Laurenzo, The enemy never sees the backs of my Texans! General Robert E. Lee, CSA, Texas history is a varied, tempestuous, and vast as the state itself. Red dirt never quite washes out, and pine pollen is tenacious as original sin. May God give you the wings of valor to soar high and spread your colors. -Davy Crockett, Thats why I like Texans so much. Birthday Quotes PNG Transparent Images Free Download | Vector Files And once again we wish you. This is really true, this is what happened to us. 900+ Texas Clip Art | Royalty Free - GoGraph The 50 Funniest Birthday Quotes - Curated Quotes Pin these Texas Quotes & Texas Instagram Captions for Your Trip! If that aint a fact, Gods a possum. It is time to party! Happy Birthday, my dearest sister. What do they tell us about America? 87 Best Nashville Quotes and Nashville Instagram Captions 2023 AUSONIUS These funny birthday quotes will put a smile on your face. Planning to Visit Texas? Kathleen Kent, Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with. Kelly Clarkson 0 Copy Booth Tarkington The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. Only Texas could turn defeat into a legendand a song, and a tourist attraction, and a major motion picture. ~Rosemary Kent, speaking of the Alamo. Happy 70th birthday! 12 Quotes About Texas to Remind You How Great the Lone-Star State when youre very mad. Cake-check, candles-check, party caps-check, the birthday person-CHECK! Texas girlsare tough as nails and you'd be hard pressed to ever shake them with adversity. This ain't my first rodeo. -James Michener, For a few precious moments Im back in Old Texas, under a high sky, where all things are again possible and the wind blows free. Whether quotes about its wide, starry skies or sayings about its rough way of life, Texas has a way of staying on your mind. But what the hell? The 105 My Birthday Quotes - WishesGreeting Enjoy the trip. Birthdays Sayings and Birthdays Quotes | Wise Sayings -Janine Turner, Texas is a state of mind. Funny 60th Birthday Quotes. )Why shear a pig?Dont snap my garters.A guilty fox hunts his own hole.Quit hollering down the rain.Dont rile the wagon master.Better to keep your mouth shut and seem a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.The barn doors open and the mules trying to run. Texas Birthday Quotes - ShortQuotes.cc "I choose Nashville.". -Sissy Spacek, In Texas, we practically come out of the womb in jeans. "When I was young, the Dead Sea was still alive.". On your birthday, I promise to keep all your secrets, to flood you with gifts and never to miss a chance to make you smile. Texas Sayings and Texas Quotes | Wise Sayings How much we love you so. Congratulations, and may life keeps smiling at you as it has been up to now. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest." Check out these belated birthday wishes if you're looking to make it up to your friend whose. It ought to do so, for no country upon the globe can compare with it in natural advantages. Hes got a big hole in his screen door.Shes one bubble off plumb.Shes one brick shy of a load.Shes two sandwiches short of a picnic.Hes a few pickles short of a barrel.Theres a light or two burned out on his string.Hes missing a few buttons off his shirt.The porch lights on but no ones home.Hes lost his vertical hold.Hes overdrawn at the memory bank.I hear you clucking, but I cant find your nest.Shes got too many cobwebs in the attic.Crazy as a bullbat.Crazy as Larrabees calf. Here are 30 famous birthday quotes for your friends and loved ones: Live long and prosper. Perfect 50th Birthday Quotes for 2023 | Routinely Nomadic Nows Your Chance. I wouldnt trust him any farther than I could throw him. 28 Famous Texas Quotes and Texas Sayings If a duck had his brain, it would fly north for the winter.He doesnt have enough sense to spit downwind.If he was bacon, he wouldnt even sizzle.If brains were leather, he couldnt saddle a flea.He carries his brains in his back pocket.Dumb as dirt.Dumb as a box of rocks.Dumb as a barrel of hair.Dumb as a post.Dumb as a wagon wheel.Dumb as a prairie dog.Dumb as a watermelon.He doesnt know come here from sic em.He doesnt know enough to pound sand down a rat hole.He cant ride and chew at the same time.So stupid if you put his brains in a bumblebee, itd fly backwards.If all her brains were ink, she couldnt dot an i.If all his brains were dynamite, he couldnt blow his nose.He dont know which ends up.He dont know a widget from a whangdoodle.He dont know nothing from nothing.He dont know diddly squat.He couldnt pour piss out of a boot with a hole in the toe and the directions on the heel.If he had a brain, itd die of loneliness.So thick-headed you can hit him in the face with a tire iron and he wont yell till morning.He could screw up an anvil. A version of this article appears in our 2019. hes cheap. Wishing you a Texas sized birthday! | Happy birthday greetings, Happy Lauren Larson is a former features writer and editor. Happy Birthday, Texas! | The Daytripper Were still figuring out how to spell tolerance. She also released several albums during the period 2003-08. 125 Best Texas Quotes and Texas Instagram Captions 2023 A family affair! You were too hard to raise to take chances.Dont dig up more snakes than you can kill.Whistle before you walk into a strangers camp.Dont plow too close to the cotton.A dead snake can still bite.A dead bee can still sting.Dont tip over the outhouse. -Katherine Dunn, Only Texas could turn defeat into a legendand a song, and a tourist attraction, and a major motion picture. )He learned to whisper in a sawmill. 3. Make Them Smile With These Funny Birthday Messages "There's no better place than Texas to start over." - John Connelly. Just a small serving. 100+ Humorous Funny Birthday Wishes & Quotes 65th Birthday Birthday Wishes Birthday Friends Husband Birthday Birthday Wishes Happy Birthday Sister Funny 60th Birthday 50th Birthday 50 Year Old Birthday Love Belated Birthday Thank You Explore the Lone Star State with Enchanting Texas Travel Blog. Yay, you're here! After all, by the time they've turned 60, most people can take a good senior joke or two. Birthday Texas Quotes, Quotations & Sayings 2023 - Search Quotes Otherwise, I wish you a very happy day, darling. Best Birthday Quotes with Sincere Wishes for Your Loved One The Texanist: Is My Husbands Devotion to Texas-Branded Foods Crazy? The Ultimate Texas Brand Bracket Is Down to Its Elite Eight, Ford or Chevy? Comedian Jim Gaffigan's funny birthday quote is the ideal way to wish a loved one a happy birthday. -Pat Green, You dont just move to Texas. READ MORE. May your birthday be as sweet as you are. You are such a sweetheart babe! They don't treat beatniks too good in Texas. I wrestle with these questions all the time. Here you go! If you get sick, injured, or have your stuff stolen, youll be happy to have the ability to pay for your medical bills or replace whats stolen or broken. hapy birthday happy birthday. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back. Singers Jessica Simpson, Beyonce, Hillary Duff, Kelly Clarkson and Demi Lovato are a few famous faces who hail from Texas. And all that you would do. Inspiring Birthday Quotes "God gave us the gift of life; it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well." Voltaire "You were born an original. Levi's All Grown Up! Matthew McConaughey, Camila Alves Bring Son to Gala Texas girls are a whole different breed. John Cusack, What you northerners never appreciate is that Texas is so big that you can live your life within its limits and never give a damn about what anyone in Boston or San Francisco thinks. James Michener, I like it here in Austin. As exciting as waiting for paint to dry.As exciting as a mashed-potato sandwich.As much fun as chopping wood.Dull as Henrys bone. Texas history for $200, Alex. Looking for famous Texas quotes, Texas sayings, and Texas one liners? Barbara Jordan: Biography, Politician, Congresswoman See more ideas about birthday greetings, birthday, greetings. - The US death toll from . He was asked on his last birthday earlier this year his secret to longevity. We also want to be the first people to greet you a Happy Birthday! She oversees the magazines travel and style sections. I felt a little guilty about jangling the poor buggers brains with that evil fantasy. Happy birthday to someone who's wonderful in every way. 10. Preaching to the choir.Burning daylight.Arguing with a wooden Indian.Whistling up the wind.Hollering down a well. Its better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.Thats close enough for government work.Might as well. In Texas, if you concentrate and work at it steadily, you can traverse your territory by about age thirty-seven. 800-810-1617 gograph@gograph.com; Login. Top Nashville Sayings for Instagram. It was like Austin, Texas. Craig Ferguson, Read More: 25 Famous Quotes about Austin, Texas. I Had to Fight My Way Up" - Patrick Swayze Long live the dirty dancing Patrick Swayze! Dont mess with Texas. Texas Department of Transportation slogan for a campaign to reduce littering on Texas roadways. Hope your year is better than those ears! Don't die a copy." John Mason Quotes to Live By Herere the best Texas sayings, quotes, and expressions. On my birthday, I wished for a friend like you. (Throwing up. We moved to Texas and we loved it so much that we started this site! He stays in the shadow of his mamas apron.If he was melted down, he couldnt be poured into a fight.Hes first cousin to Moses Rose.He wouldnt bite a biscuit.Hes yellow as mustard but without the bite.He may not be a chicken, but he has his henhouse ways. You don't know the Lone Star State until you've experienced Gruene Hall. I love Texas because Texas is future-oriented because Texans think anything is possible. He could fall up a tree.Couldnt ride a nightmare without falling out of bed.He couldnt knock a hole in the wind with a sackful of hammers.So bad at farming he couldnt raise Cain.He couldnt hit the floor if he fell out of bed.Handy as hip pockets on a hog.Worthless as teats on a bull.Worthless as a sidesaddle on a sow.Not worth spit.He couldnt organize a pissing contest in a brewery.Useless as two buggies in a one-horse town.He could screw up a two-car funeral.Tie a quarter to it and throw it away, and you can say you lost something.Hes got no more chance than a June bug in the chicken coop.Hes a day late and a dollar short.He cant win for losing.Hes sucking hind teat.I need that like a tomcat needs a trousseau.Shes itching for something she wont scratch for.Why close the barn door after the horses are out?No more good than an eyeless needle.Like warming up leftover snow.Like pushing a wheelbarrow with rope handles.Like sweet-talking the water out of the well. As welcome as an egg-sucking dog unwelcome. Hes on a first-name basis with the bottom of the deck.So crooked that if he swallowed a nail hed spit up a corkscrew.So crooked you cant tell from his tracks if hes coming or going.He knows more ways to take your money than a roomful of lawyers.Crooked as a dogs hind leg.Crooked as the Brazos.Slicker than a slop jar.More twists than a pretzel factory.Crooked as a barrel of fish hooks.So crooked he has to unscrew his britches at night.Shes more slippery than a pocketful of pudding.Hes slicker than a boiled onion.I wouldnt trust him any farther than I can throw him. I wrestle with these questions all the time. Like trying to bag flies.Like putting socks on a rooster.Easy as pissing up a rope. Oct 2, 2014 - Explore rosa hernandez's board "Texas birthday greetings" on Pinterest. -John Steinbeck. That is truer than true! 2. Congratulations on surviving another year on this planet. He left behind 8 children, 21 grandchildren, 32 great-grandchildren, and a 15 foot hole in the crematorium. 4. Today is the most important day of my life. Now I hope all your wishes come true. Above all, Texas is a nation in every sense of the word.